Wednesday, 2 March 2016

When Orgasms Just Won't Come

 It’s been said that in our culture there exists an “orgasmic imperative”; an ideal which dictates how many, how strong, and how often we should all be orgasming. In a rougher part of town I might call this orgasmic imperative b#llsh*t but here let me put forth a modest proposal.  

Orgasms, while lots of fun, are not required for great sex.  And when you keep your focus obsessively trained on one aspect of your sexual activity it’s easy to miss any number of exciting, hot, and revealing things passing by your peripheral experience.  Still, for people who aren’t orgasming, or think they can’t, there is often (if not always) a path to more intense sexual response, including orgasm.  And if that’s you, hopefully you’ll find some of the following helpful.  ~ Cory

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When Orgasms Just Won't Come

 It’s been said that in our culture there exists an “orgasmic imperative”; an ideal which dictates how many, how strong, and how often we should all be orgasming. In a rougher part of town I might call this orgasmic imperative b#llsh*t but here let me put forth a modest proposal.  

Orgasms, while lots of fun, are not required for great sex.  And when you keep your focus obsessively trained on one aspect of your sexual activity it’s easy to miss any number of exciting, hot, and revealing things passing by your peripheral experience.  Still, for people who aren’t orgasming, or think they can’t, there is often (if not always) a path to more intense sexual response, including orgasm.  And if that’s you, hopefully you’ll find some of the following helpful.  ~ Cory

Cory Silverberg
Sexuality Expert
I Can’t Orgasm  

 In my experience most people who think they can’t orgasm actually can, they just don’t.  Because orgasm is an experience that can engage your mind, body, and spirit, any number of things can get in the way.  Here’s a way to start sleuthing out what might be getting in the way of your orgasm.

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Everything Works Fine…When I'm Alone  
It’s not uncommon for people to have orgasms when they’re having sex with themselves but not during sex with partners.  How can you tell whether to use the “it’s not you it’s me” line or the simpler “it’s you”?
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Unexpected Orgasms  
It’s a little like an unexpected guest knocking at your door in the middle of dinner.  Only it’s not your door that’s being knocked on, and instead of dinner, it’s sex.
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Orgasm and Drugs  
Honestly the idea of a pill that would give you an orgasm holds no appeal for me.  Arguably the most interesting part of an orgasm is how you got there.  Plus I’m no good at swallowing pills (I always have to jerk my head back and make a face, even if the pill doesn’t stick in my throat.  I’m pretty wussy).  The reality is that currently most pills do way more to hurt your orgasm than they do to help.  Find out whether any of the prime suspects are in your medicine cabinet.
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